COR TE REDUCIT

Cut your losses and don’t waste your time.  Why stay in some weird dating limbo when you can move on to what will surely be better territory? Don’t want to hear it?  Fine.  Here’s the answer you’re looking for, “Hang in there, baby.  He’s not the loser everybody’s telling you he is.  If you wait and keep your mouth shut and call at exactly the right time and anticipate his moods and have no expectations about communication or your own sexual needs, you can have him!”  But please don’t be surprised if he dumps you or continues to drag you through a completely unsatisfying relationship.

The word “busy ” is a load of crap and is most often used by assholes. The word “busy” is the relationship Weapon of Mass Destruction. Remember: Men are never too busy to get what they want. If he’s not calling you, it’s because you are not on his mind. Don’t be with someone who doesn’t do what they say they’re going to do. “Busy” is another word for “asshole.”  “Asshole” is another word for the guy you’re dating. You deserve a fucking phone call.

Don’t think you’re asking too much by wanting someone to be pure-hearted with you. You deserve honesty.

It was him not fighting for me.

I gave him the ultimatum and he let me walk away.

I didn’t want a life separate from him, and that’s all he could give me.

It’s like he is driving a car and I just want to be in the passenger seat.

He’s locked the door and I have to hold onto the bumper.

I am not even asking him to open the door for me,

just leave it unlocked and say come in,

but he didn’t do that.

So I am hanging on to the bumper and

life goes on and the car goes on,

and I get really badly bruised and I’m hitting potholes.

And it hurts. It really hurts.

So yesterday I had to let go of the bumper.

Because it hurts too much.

I think your heart grows back bigger you know, once you get the shit beat out of you. And the universe lets your heart expand that way, because that’s the function of all this pain and heartache that you go through. And you gotta go through that to come out to a better place.

The one God has meant for us is going to be the hardest to get, the hardest to keep, and the hardest to accept because through all that love will grow stronger, bonds will become thicker, and the future will become more clear. Love wasn’t made to be easy, otherwise we wouldn’t end up with the right person — we would end up with the first one who comes along. By struggling we single out the wrong ones and realize who really is the one.

Standard suggestions:

1. I will not go out with a man who hasn’t asked me first.

2. I will not go out with a man who keeps me waiting by my phone.

3. I will not date a man who isn’t sure he wants to date me.

4. I will not, under any circumstances, spend my precious time with a man who has already rejected me.

5. I will not be with a man who is not clearly a good, kind, loving person.

Okay, I thought. Here you are. You Are Here. And you move forward because that’s the way it works; thats the only place you can go. You keep going until it stops hurting, or until you find new things to hurt you worse, I guess. And that is the human condition, all of us lurching along in our own private miseries, because that’s the way it is. Because, I guess, God didn’t give us any choice. You grow up. You learn.

Sometimes you have to be strong for yourself. You have to know that you are a good person and a good friend. What is meant to be will end up good and what is not won’t. Relationships are worth fighting for, but sometimes you can’t be the only one fighting. At time, people need to fight for you. If they don’t, you must move on and realize what you gave them was more than they were willing to give you. Hopefully, people realize great things when they come around and don’t lose something real. Always fight, until you can’t anymore, and then be fought for.

I owe you nothing.

And you are nothing to me.

Thank you for curing me of my ridiculous obsession with love.

Well…you kinda just have to like, wallow for a little bit. You know, give yourself a good cry and everything. And then, eventually, you have to convince yourself (truthfully) that you’re worth way more than what he’s giving you. And yes, it’s going to take a million tries to get this down. It might take a while to actually convince yourself of this. But then, one day, you’ll realize that sometimes you just have to let some things go. Then, once you’ve realized this, you’ll find one person who you feel is good for you, and you’ll feel like you have more knowledge about how things go, and you’ll be more ready just in case something does happen.

The heart is a muscle like any other

&&the best exercise you can do for it

is called picking yourself up off the floor.

This is the acceptance speech.

The end of anger and denial.

I accept that you and I will never be the same again.

That while those days will live in my mind forever, they’re over.

I hate it. But I accept it.

And I’m moving on now.